I was just like any little girl growing up. I always dreamt about what it would be like to get married and have kids of my own. I wondered what I would be like as a mom. I promised myself I would do things different than what I had seen or experienced. I told myself no matter what my family would be my everything, my priority. I had a vision of what I thought being married with kids would look like. What I came to realize was that a vision and reality were two very different things.
I never expected to get divorced with a one year old. That wasn’t the goal when I got married and sure wasn’t a part of the plan after having a baby. There was a lot that happened that I wish I could change and do differently, but what I have realized is that no matter how much I wish the past could be different, it has shaped me into the momma I am now.
My son was and will always be my priority. He is that breath of fresh air that fills my lungs and that light in the darkness I need. He is three and has no idea how much life he truly gives me. There are so many life lessons for him to learn, but one in particular had to come much sooner than I would have liked. That lesson would be that sometimes staying in a relationship when you’re not happy is worse than figuring out what life will look like single. I want him to know and see what pure and effortless love looks like. I want him to know that you can love someone with all your heart, but sometimes it just isn’t enough and that is okay. One day he will know the why, but for now, him seeing his momma happy and loving life is the most important thing I can show him.
This chapter of my life was never a part of the plan, but that is how life goes. It will throw you curve balls and unexpected trials, but what matters the most when you look back is how you chose to handle them. We have a journey to go on and this single momma has a lot to share, so buckle up.
– Em
The Single Momma 