Have you ever been at the playground with your toddler and they are having the best time and you know that you’re about to ruin their little life with four words….It’s time to go.
WORST PARENT EVER
How could you possibly make them leave when they are having so much fun and getting their energy out running around? In that moment you are single handedly ruining their day, terrible.
Yeah….as a parent I know this all to well from the many times I have told B it was time to go. What a learning curve it is to be a first time parent. You are the best because you took them to the park and an hour later the worst human ever. Trying to navigate how to get a toddler to do something you know they will hate when they are still learning to regulate their own emotions should be a new Olympic sport.
I have said it before and I’ll continue to say it. I am not a parenting expert and have zero degrees in anything psychology or child development related. BUT I have experience for the last 4.5 years and I like to write and share about it. Here is the newest little key that we have unlocked on our play dates.
Time is so arbitrary to the little mind. They don’t really know what “10 minutes left” means because time is not a construct they really comprehend yet. I have learned that when I have told B that we had 10 minutes left and then 5 minutes later tell him we have 5 minutes left he always says, “momma you said 10 minutes.” It isn’t something tangible he can connect to yet.
You know what does make sense in his little mind though, how many more times he can get to do something. When we are at the park and it is getting close to departure, I have started saying, “Hey B you have 3 more slides then we have to go.” He can count, he knows what the slide is. To him, this makes it something he can physically see occur and know when his time is getting close.
Every single time I have done this, he comes to me after each one and counts down how many are left. He gets it. By the time he has completed his last slide, he says, “All done momma, let’s go!” By no means is he the one dictating when we leave but in his little mind he was able to do things until his count ran out and he could physically see it happen.
This doesn’t just apply at the park. When he gets to watch TV for a little bit before bed, it isn’t “10 more minutes”, it is “one more episode.” When he gets a sweet treat like candy, it isn’t “don’t eat it all” but rather “you can have 5 more.”
Giving B something he can be in control of, by counting down, makes the whole situation better for everyone involved. I am no expert and at the end of the day I am learning on the go, but me and B make quite the team and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
3 more slides buddy. <3
The Single Momma 